What Sucks About Being a Christian…

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For years I had a plan. A plan to take my family and I to the next level financially by working towards a job I’ve wanted to do since I was a child. So, in 2017 I hunkered down and went back to school to get the requirements I needed for said job. The school portion was a breeze; at least it was for me. Others in my class—not so much. Within a couple weeks, the class was cut in half due to dropping out from bad grades. For myself, I was sure it was easy for me because this is what God planned for my life. I was excited. I felt God was finally working miracles in my life, and once I finished school, he continued to. I checked online for details on this dream job, and it stated the average time to be hired for this position was two years, and it wasn’t lying. Once I received my credentials, after a year and a half of applying, I finally was offered the position. Not just any position, mind you, the position I wanted with the top company I wanted as well. My family and I were ecstatic. I told everyone the news I came in contact with, and so did my wife. Soon, my family, extended family and all our friends were excited about this new position. We even hosted a small get together to celebrate. I had finally realized my dream and felt everything was falling into place. I couldn’t stop thanking God for what he’s done. It was an indescribable feeling of accomplishment. I felt God and I were uniquely in tune.

I was offered a provisional job offer. Which means, for this career, all I had to do was pass a physical and the position was mine. It was the only condition, and I wasn’t worried. I played sports my entire life from six-years-old until I graduated high school; from football, to basketball, to tennis, to track-and-field, I did it all. To this day, I still exercise 3-4 times a week. In my mind, it was a sure thing.

Soon, the day of the physical had come, and I was excited to finally get the intensely long hiring process over with and finalize my position with the company. Yet, on the day of the test, little did I know one portion of the physical exam would haunt me for the rest of my days.

The nurse pulled out a spirometer, which she explained was an instrument to determine lung capacity. All I had to do was take a deep breath, breathe into the machine forcefully, and then inhale forcefully. Easy enough, I thought, since as I mentioned, I exercise almost daily. So I did just that. Right after I performed the test, I heard beeping. She looked me in my eyes and said, “we had to try again because the results were too low.” It didn’t bother me. Maybe I didn’t take a deep enough breath,I thought. So we did it again—and again—and again—and again, till I was very lightheaded. Each time, the results were still below the required range. At this point, I was getting nervous. I knew I should’ve passed this portion of the physical by now, but for some reason I was struggling. Eventually, the nurse gave up and left the room. I waited confused, unsure of what was happing, but I knew it wasn’t good. Soon, an older doctor entered the room and began to explain to me that I may have asthma.

Asthma?Are you kidding me, I thought? There’s no way I could have asthma if I exercise regularly with no issues. I recommended we do the tests again after the rest of the the physical, so we did. Again, the results were the same. I couldn’t pass the spirometer.

After, he recommended I see a pulmonologist to confirm his suspicions. So I did, and unfortunately, I heard the same words. “You have asthma.” Not only do I have asthma, the pulmonologist explained, but Asthma is a disqualifying disability for the job I was hired for. The results were sent to the company and soon I got a phone call explaining they could no longer offer me the job because of this.

The amount of devastation cannot be explained in words.

I had worked three years for this, and with a simple test, it was all stripped away. After three years of planning, and spending money on tuition and licensing, it was now all a waste. I cried, my wife cried, we all cried. How can you let this happen, God? I thought. I thought we had the same plan? I didn’t want to admit it, but for days I fell into a deep depression. How could I not? After three years of wasted time, I was back to square one about what I wanted to do with my life along with finding out I have a disease of the lungs. To make matters worse, with the depression came embarrassment. I now had to go back to all my friends, family, wife’s family, wife friends, and everyone I came in contact with and explain it was all just a false alarm. Can you imagine?

This was by far one of the hardest things I have ever experienced in my entire thirty plus years of life.

And this, my friends, is what sucks about being a Christian. I thought I knew Gods plan. I thought we were in sync. I thought we were in agreement of with everything that had happened. How could I not? Every thing I did for the last three years was obviously blessed along the way. So what happened?

At this point it’s too early to tell. This has all happened much to recently, but I do know one thing. GOD’S PLAN IS BETTER THAN OURS! It wasn’t until I received a message at church—one of those message where it seems the preacher is speaking directly to you. By the Holy Spirit, he was. It overwhelmingly rekindled the faith I have in Christ and gave me peace with the situation. I thought I knew God’s plan, but I didn’t. In Jeremiah 1, the Lord says he knew us before we were born, and because of this, it means we were born for a reason. I thought this reason was this job, but it wasn’t. It’s something else, and I’m excited to see what it is. Why am I excited? Because I know it will be something better than what I planned. If I went through all this, and was denied my dream job, it simply means God’s dream job for my life is much better. I will reach more people, touch more lives, and spread God’s Word so much farther with God’s plan over my own plan. This is exactly why he did what he did. Our God is perfect, and everything that comes with him is perfect—including His plan for our lives. This is why Christ always asks Christians to have faith, because no matter what happens in our lives—good or bad, it’s for a reason, and good will always come from it. Why? All together now: “Because his plan is perfect!” So even though not knowing God’s plan is the sucky part of Christianity, what’s even greater is the comfort of knowing God’s always in control, and he’s leading you to something better.

 

P.S – I will update this article once I know why God allowed this to happen. I’m looking forward to it.

–The Christian Realist

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